the ying & yang of life

hi. I have two things to post. One of them is good and happy while the other one is the total opposite. Let's get cranking then.

I am over here in Johor living in a 'felda' or one of those rubber/palm tree estate. It's pretty nice here. We drove all the way from Kuala Lumpur to Johor. The car was packed with all that luggage. It was very tiring but the view is nice :)

We went to the night market in Segamat and we bought some indian snack delicacies. It was still hot when we bought it and it was good. We also bought fruits, they looked very fresh and appetizing to the extent that you cannot pass one of the fruit stalls without buying anything. I would say that most of the things there are pretty cheap and that is a big plus for a thrifty shopper like me.

I don't know where we're going tomorrow but I sure do hope that we go some place interesting. I would love to go to the big aquarium over in KL - Aquaria but we're only going to the big city after the 10th

now comes the bad part.............

I failed my 'Malaysian Legal System' - D & my pointer was only 2.6 which makes my average just at 2.8 something. I don't think I can go into law this way.

I am very sad. It was my fault anyway for taking the subject so lightly. I am just disappointed. I feel like killing myself...but obviously I won't do that because I guess I still think that there is a way out in everything that we do. I cannot describe in words how disappointed I am. I want to cry...badly...but I know crying won't solve things.

I am lost for words. I just wish that I could somehow bring this feeling of guilt on to the next semester so I won't procastinate on my studies. I think the problem with me now is I procastinate things. I seriously hope I can change in the future.

I feel like at this point my heart is stabbed with a knife. I feel so useless, worthless.

I am such a disappointment. damn...